Teenage Lilly just rolled her eyes at me

By 965koit on September 25, 2019
Lilly playing the ukelele with me in front of her crib.

Music has been a huge part of my life. From sitting in front of the radio with my tape recorder trying to steal my favorite songs, to making a living playing music for people. I’ve always been obsessed with music, and selfishly, I hope Lilly is too.

When I was a kid I would sit in front of the TV and play my plastic guitar while watching La Bamba. Yes, I know that movie isn’t really appropriate for a 5 year old, but times were different. Then, in middle school, I joined the orchestra and played the viola through high school.

Recently I re-watched Guardians of Galaxy and got the idea to leave my legacy behind in the form of a playlist. In the movie, Starlord’s mom makes him mixtapes of her favorite songs. Unfortunately, she dies of cancer when he is little, and all he has to remember her by are these tapes. No, I’m not trying to reveal a secret sickness I’ve been living with, I just like the idea of making mixtapes for Lilly.

It will be a fun way to tell Lilly the story of my life. The goal is to find those songs that explain how I felt in certain key moments. I’ll include songs I sang over and over and songs that have special meanings. When I think about my parents and their lives before me, I know practically nothing about them. Kristen keeps telling me to ask but it’s just not how our family works. We don’t talk about stuff, well at least they don’t with me. Which makes it difficult for me to open up and talk about my life. I’m assuming that I’ll have trouble talking to Lilly, so this is a way for me to do it without feeling awkward.

Making these decisions are going to be hard. But I think this will be a cool way to bond with Lilly when she’s older. Will she care? I have no idea. Should I spend more time making a WILL or saving for her college fund? Probably, but that doesn’t sound fun at all.

If you were going to tell the story of your life in music, what would be the first song you add to your mixtape?


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